Honestly, who doesn’t love taking a swift right hook to the cheekbone? Or a roundhouse kick to the sternum? Anyone? Anyone? Ok, those questions are absurd since a tiny percentage of the population enjoys suffering from those masochistic activities. But beyond the immediate excruciating pain, there are some valuable lessons to learn from bearing the brunt of such violence, especially if you lose the fight. To be clear, I am in no way condoning or advocating for the use of violence outside of an absolute last measure to defend oneself or another from imminent physical harm. In this article, I am merely playing devil’s advocate by engaging in a brief mental exercise of looking at the silver linings to losing a fistfight. With that said, let’s continue to the potential lessons.

Lesson #1: Confidence is Earned For many people, developing confidence in themselves to perform different skills may be a long, drawn-out process that produces varying degrees of success. In such scenarios, some people develop a false sense of confidence. The phrase ”false sense of confidence” does not mean that they have not developed the skills to succeed. Instead, it conveys that those skills may not be adequately battle-tested in the real world. I believe the old boxing saying goes something like,” everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.” I may not have the accurate jargon, but the sentiment is there. There’s nothing more real-world battle-tested than taking a firm swinging elbow to the jaw and finding a way to keep on ticking. Just about anyone who has taken a physical beatdown and has gone on to fight again has likely experienced a feeling of liberation, knowing that they can take the punishment, recuperate, and push forward. The confidence backed by knowing that you are not phased by receiving an excellent old-fashioned ass-kicking is solid.

Lesson #2: Sometimes the Best Defense is Situational Awareness Situational awareness is an essential and, ironically, overlooked set of skills. Knowing when and how to use them can often help you avoid rather unpleasant circumstances or mitigate the negative outcome of such cases. Of all the lessons referenced in this article, this is the most cerebral because it involves taking in current and past information to predict future events. You may be wondering how does this applies to getting your ass kicked. That’s simple. Receiving a beatdown, especially if it’s your first such instance, will bring this lesson home for you, unlike most other scenarios. Having such a wealth of information from how you ended up getting your ass kicked would go a long way to help you avoid such fights in the future or be better prepared for the next one. The following sentence may be a bit controversial, but it is empowering. Reviewing and understanding how you were an active participant in the lead-up to receiving your beating is essential in developing your situational awareness skills related to this topic. The great thing about situational awareness is that it transfers to any area of your life in which decision-making is critical.

Lesson #3: Don’t Get Ready, Stay Ready I’m sure you’ve heard this saying before, or at least some variation of it. It holds not only in fighting but in life. One undeniable truth about losing a hard-fought fist fight, it stays on your mind. Not only does it stay on your mind, but it may torment you. Now, most people may take the torment as pure torture. However, a more constructive way of approaching this is to embrace the torment as constant motivation to prepare you for future confrontations. Sure, this approach could go south, turning you into a tightly wound maniac, but if you’re able to use a logical strategy to stay the course responsibly, it could pay off big dividends in future fights and life. One such example is as follows: 

A physically and emotionally bullies B regularly. After weeks of A bullying B, B finally takes a stand against A, resulting in a fistfight. B loses fistfight to A in spectacular fashion. B realizes B could hold B’s own against A with some fight training, although the loss stung severely. B gets adequate exercise to build upon B’s confidence. In addition to B being prepared for any potential future confrontations, B applies this newfound confidence to stand up for themself as well as others. As B matures in B’s confidence, B is rarely at a loss when it comes to standing up for themself or others, whether physically or diplomatically.

Lesson #4: If Life Knocks You Down… In a more general sense, suffering a lousy beatdown can be a perfect metaphor for what life can do to you at times. Indeed, you will not win every fight, but it is also true that every battle will present an opportunity for you to learn something about yourself, especially when you lose. That something is ” grit.” Do you have the courage and stamina (emotional/physical/mental) to regularly take the challenges that life throws at you, learn from them, and then push past them? If you’ve ever been in a fistfight (or multiple fistfights) and lost yet used the experience to become stronger (mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically), you are likely much more primed to handle life’s challenges than most people.

Lesson #5: Refine your Approach to Life’s Challenges Whenever you’ve been knocked down by yet another one of life’s many challenges (or a knife-hand strike to the throat), what do you likely do next? Recuperate, of course. But right after that, the best thing to do is to develop improvements on your approach to addressing this challenge, that is, if complete avoidance isn’t a realistic option. Of course, there are many types of motivations that you can use to keep your focus on refining your approach to conquering the challenge. One is knowing and acknowledging your fixable weaknesses. The other is having a badly bruised ego. Nothing can potentially bring those two together quite like losing a fight. Just think of an instance when you intently wanted to prove someone wrong after failing to do so previously. Now add on top of that intensity the knowledge that that particular someone bested you in a fight, not because they’re stronger or faster or more skilled, but because they outthought you. Remember that burn inside of you, desperately wanting to rectify that past failure? Good. Now apply that same type of intense laser focus on improving the approach to all challenges in your life, whether it be related to work, social, family, hobby, or whatever pursuits you find worthwhile.

With all of that said, there are more lessons that were not mentioned above, or perhaps you disagree with the previous lessons mentioned. Either way, feel free to leave a comment to express your thoughts on the subject matter.